Thursday, January 29, 2009

Margaret & Helen take on Ann Coulter

Helen of Margaret & Helen decided to take one on the chin and read Ann Coulter's latest trash. Here is a portion of her take on the first chapter. That's all she has gotten down so

So I made some calls and found a copy of Ann Coulter’s new book at a used bookstore here in town. I was happy to know that my dollars would not go to support her, but I am a bit worried about a book that ended up in a used bookstore two weeks after it was published. Now Margaret told me she probably couldn’t find a Coulter book new, used or otherwise where she lives, so I told her to relax. I’ll read it and give her (and all of you) a summary here. Sort of a my version of the old Cliffs Notes concept. Do they still have those?

When I’m done anyone wanting the book can send me their address and we can mail it around until everyone has read it. That way no one has to actually buy it firsthand.

Anyway, here is the Hell ‘N Notes version of Guilty: Liberal “Victims” and Their Assault on America by Ann Bigfoot Coulter
Chapter 1 - Liberal Motto: Speak Loudly and Carry a Small Victim

Now right off the bat I am a bit disappointed because Ann’s having a law degree led me to believe that she would be able to write intelligently. Apparently she can’t. I know they say that when you write for the masses you should strive for an 8th grade level vocabulary, but Ann must have lowered the standards a bit realizing she would be writing exclusively for an audience of right-wing conservatives. It appears she choose to write at an obedience school level. And even then she barely gets a passing grade in my book. Here is an example:

“Today there are more men who are sexually aroused by women in stiletto heels crushing live frogs to death while talking erotically to the frog than there are members of the Ku Klux Klan.”

As you can see, she has quite a funny take on it. But then they both have a funny take on life in general and Republicans especially...The post before this one was, Apparently Ann Coulters Feet Are As Big As An Emus. It was hilarious.

Here is another bit of her post today,

Now I know you think I am exaggerating or otherwise misrepresenting Ann’s words but honestly the woman really is an amazing yarn teller. She suggests the O.J. verdict is proof that racism doesn’t exist and Barack Obama was race-baiting when he referred to himself as black because he should have described himself as ”half white”.

Really. You can’t make this stuff up - unless you are Ann Coulter. My favorite part is when she claims “the poor” are actually counterfeit victims. That’s right folks - George Bush and Tom Delay can be victims but a poor person is either lying about being poor or deserves to be poor. Well I am glad Ms. Coulter has lots of money because when you are poor it is hard to afford designer shoes in a size 17ww. By the way, for some unknown reason Ann likes to put lots of individual words in quotations like “poor” and “racism” to suggest that those concepts really don’t exist. It’s an awkward writing style and kind of bothered me as a reader, but maybe Ann is just “smarter” than I am.

That sounds just like Ann Coulter. She has always seen herself as a victim, but not anyone else and she continues that thought in her book it seems like as Helen notes in her post, Ann says the only victims are
”George Bush, the duke Lacrosse players, Joe McCarthy, Jesse Helms, Tom Delay, the Swift Boat Veterans, and Sarah Palin.

But, check it out... they are great. Each of these ladies have such a unique way of putting things and even though they are not young they must be very young at heart. I love reading them. I am sure after reading a couple you will too.

No comments: